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Saturday, July 16, 2016

Survival Files: Friday's Visit to Oncology

When your doctor has the report in her hand, looks at you and says "I really didn't want to have to tell you this..." Ugh! What now? Well...cancer in the margins. Two of the tumors that were taken out came back from pathology showing cancer cells in the margin or the tissue surrounding where the tumors were taken out.

Drowning my sorrows in a dark chocolate
coffee cooler
So, depending on what the surgeons say on Monday, looks like I am back in for another surgery before we get started with chemo. Yuck! There was some good news in all of this and that was that there were 23 lymph nodes removed (no wonder I can still hardly move my arm without pain) and only the one that was biopsied showed any cancer. WOO HOO! So there is definitely something we can celebrate there! I asked about my iron levels after the infusion and she sent me to the lab.

As we left there for the lab I really felt that if I talked at all I would start crying so we got to the lab and I was called back pretty quickly. Understand, there is very little to offer when I put out my left arm, and even less when there were two veins that had recently been used for blood draw and IV in the hospital.

The one who started the blood draw had to call someone else over to help and she used a small vein and a butterfly needle and syringe. I am looking forward to the results of the blood test even though I was feeling pretty down about the whole visit. When I saw the blood fill the syringe it looked thick and dark red. I haven't seen blood come from my body that looked that good in forever! I have been anemic for a long time.

As I let it all sink in David took me to the coffee shop there at the PCI building and I decided to order a large...with whip cream. It helped to have something to drink while I got used to the thought of another surgery. More than likely it will be out patient and I won't have to spend the night. I only say what I am guessing because I won't really know anything til Monday.
Matthew and Zachary acting out Elephant and Piggie

I am thankful for my family. I am thankful that I could come home and crawl into bed feeling defeated and just rest. My mom popped over the to find out how the appointment went. I shared with her what we learned and she hung out for awhile and we got my mind on other things. I was covered in my blanket and she was thinking of some old fabric that she might still have around to give me to work on some patches while I am still recovering.

Then, I got a message from my aunt that she may be coming through town tomorrow and could stop in and visit. Then my kids...they are just fun to hang around with! Matthew and Zachary decided to act out the first four books from their Elephant and Piggie collection. We have recently purchased the last book to make our set complete. Part of my recovery was going to be reading every single one of them together.

We ended up playing a game of Apples to Apples for a couple of hours with Grandma playing for her first time. It was a lot of laughing and fun. I was even able to start a new yarn project with the rest of the new yarn. I may report more about that as there will be more to show as I get farther along. All in all my treatment is what it is and we will deal with it.

My timetable is out of my control right now and I am thankful for sweet distractions. Another bit of good news is that the doctor told me that if I hurt to take the pain meds. I should not be rationing them out and taking what I "can get by on". She is right...today was the most comfortable day I have had all week. Mentally it is much better to have as little pain as possible. For now I am going to enjoy the weekend with my family. Monday will come soon enough.


  1. So much sadness in this world! Im so sorry you're going through this at all. I'll be praying for Monday and that the rest of the weekend is filled with sweet distractions and peace. Love Sandie

  2. Keeping you and your's in my prayers

  3. So glad to hear you and your dr agree on you using your pain medication.
    It's necessary to keep the pain down to keep your spirits up and to be able to interact as fully as possible with your family

    Each step in its own time today is good your lymph nodes report was very good and that they were able to get some blood out of you for testing was also good .

    That drink you had looked so good I bet it was yummy

    Ah the time table it is nice to have a general idea and time line of what to expect but then another life event happens and it changes

    You still can generalize about what's next but don't let the future be a burden try to just allow the future to be a general outline enjoy the now allow the beautiful memories of past happiness in to make those feel good brain pathways strengthen

    You are doing very well, it is tough and you and your family are in the fight together

  4. Prayers continue for you and yours. Psalm 139 is my go to for comfort. He knows it all!! Consider yourself hugged!