Oh To Be NINE!

And just like that...my youngest is NINE! It is really hard to believe how fast time flies!

We celebrated at Grandpa and Grandmas the Sunday before.

Sisters like to get him gifts. He got new lacrosse balls from Stacey. They like to play together in the back yard and all of the balls that came with the rackets had been destroyed.

Dawn knows Matt well, a new Mario baseball cap!

Some Falcons gear from Auntie Chelle to go along with the football and flags he got from Auntie Bets and Uncle Sy at the party!

Mario Kart 8 from Mom and Dad...a boy has to race!

Here is what a sweet nine-year-old face looks like!

All geared up for another football season!

We ate at Oyamas to celebrate four birthdays this week! Crazy!

Friday From the Heart: He Will Hold Me Fast

Is it weird that I find peace and calm sitting out on my front porch listening to and watching the traffic go by on South 11th street in Marion? The wind is blowing, the sun is shining, the iced tea is refreshing. I watch as the evening "coming home from work" crowd drives past and I am thankful. Thankful for my life, and that I am sitting on this porch.

Time flies and it is hard to believe that we will be celebrating being in this house in Marion for FIVE years this coming Thanksgiving. Wow, was it ever an act of God that brought us here, no doubt. An answer to prayers and HUGE distraction during a very LONG recovery season for me. I think FIVE years and some days it still feels like I am recovering.

He Will Hold Me Fast was a blessing to me this week. I was at worship practice at church and this is a new song we practiced. I get the question often now "so how are you doing now?" I never really know how to answer that question. I will be honest, it is hard to get back into life when you aren't at the same physical level. I need to pace myself and not overdo things. For example, when I decide to go walking I need to ease back into longer distances. Not like last week when I walked for a couple of hours my first time out of the gate in a few months.

What I wrote above was actually started about 3 weeks ago. Since then I have sung this song many times and heard it in my earbuds, or blaring out from my computer. He does hold us fast. I was getting ready in the paragraph above to complain some about this chemo drug I am on. I stinks. Suppressing my estrogen and forcing my body into menopause stinks. But you know, it is not the important things of life.

I learned something on Wednesday that broke through a little bit of the "firstborn rule-follower" stereotype that is actually pretty dead on for me. My boy (my "baby" boy) is home sick. Wednesday he was at the doctor and tested positive for walking pneumonia. Thanks to a conversation with my mom when this same boy was about 5 days old, I remembered "First I am a mom..." You see, I was supposed to sub yesterday and felt TERRIBLE to have to cancel.

When I say I am going to do something, it is ingrained in me that I do it. I obsessed about it so much on Wednesday that I actually set up a back up with Mom to stay with him so I could be in that classroom. Truth is, My first job is being a mom and as my van load of kids went off to youth group (driving themselves), I realized that before I know it my "baby" will be out the door with the keys too. I remember like it was yesterday when the triplets were nine. It was a blink.

So, while he is watching a show, I type these words. And I plan for some snuggling and movie watching, Payday playing and reading together for the rest of my day. It is my job, and this job is one I move on from, someday being promoted to "empty nest Mom" and then eventually "Grandma". And the absolute truth is: I am gonna miss this!

Friday From the Heart (on Thursday)...

Brushing the dust and cobwebs off of my keyboard and my writing brain, I sit here and feel so blessed that it has been so long since I have posted. Blessed because such a gap in posts means that so much life was being lived that there has been no time to document. And, that is okay. I have actually gotten to the point that my brain no longer starts the first paragraph of a post while I am in the middle of one of life's amazing moments. I am finding myself less and less thinking "ooh, that would be good on the blog".

There is so much good. So much. We have also been living in a few months of terribleness too but isn't that the stuff of life? We experience the good and the bad and we grow stronger. Stronger alone, stronger in our relationships and stronger with God. Life means something. It isn't a specific purpose made only for me that I am trying to find somewhere along the way. It is in the everything and everyday that we find ourselves in contact with the Sovereign God. In the middle of yuck, whatever it may be (and boy can it come from every direction sometimes),  He knows and He is sovereign. I have a list of people who I know need to KNOW that right now. They are on my list, and so I pray.

Life's a dance they say (and sing), but much of it can be in a minor key. I think of how the music changes when we watch movies and then we know...this isn't going to be good. So many are experiencing the minor keys right now. How can I help, what can I do from the sidelines? There are others who have asked that question too. I don't know that there is a correct answer to that. There are actually many different things to do on the sidelines. (and if you don't count prayer as one of the most important things, I hope that you can open your eyes to this most important thing). My hands tend to get busy in times like this. Some run to their kitchen and whip up freezer meals or scrumptious baked goods. How do I know? Because I have received some of the yummiest meals and baked goods when I have needed them. Some write beautiful cards and letters of encouragement, some stop by unannounced with hugs, some may also anonymously send money in the mail, or maybe a bouquet of flowers.

Most of the time, just being present and not running from the uncomfortableness of listening to some dark thoughts or fears coming from the people we care about is huge! That is what helps the depressed and the hopeless ones in the world. Not backing down or bowing out until the waters are calm again. Nobody needs people like that around in bad times, or in good for that matter.

I was looking for a good image to go along with my blog today and found these bleeding hearts. I have loved bleeding hearts since I was young. I would like to challenge my friends who may not be as comfortable in the adversity. There was a day when I certainly wasn't. Run toward those who need you. If you don't know what to do, ask God for a good idea. We often think of prayer for the people who are hurting, sick or dying but what would happen if we also prayed "Lord help ME to be a light and a help and a support when I am so unsure of what to do." God helps the one in adversity as well as those who want to help. So, if you don't know what to do, ask God. If you are looking for a special purpose, that is yours. To love, not in the good times but in the adversity and always seek Him when you are unsure.