I wish I would have been better at sitting down and blogging about a few really earth shaking things that have been happening around here at our house. I originally set up this blog years ago when the kids were babies and I wanted to keep our far away friends and relatives up to date with our growing family.
Then when breast cancer hit in 2013, I was so thankful that I had the blog to keep people posted about my progress (or set backs). So many of you were a HUGE part of my journey through that and it was a blessing to me.
During that time I was posting pretty regularly and have found that as I have gotten back into the full swing of living, the blog has been put to the side and has not been a priority. Well, I realized that it was therapy to sit and reflect on what was happening in my crazy life whether people read about it or not. (I say crazy because as I sit here looking at my calendar I am perplexed at how I can be two, three or four places at once on some days!)
I have children who are dealing with new life situations every day and it feels like we are spinning some days faster than we can handle. To be honest, the whole point of sitting here today and writing is that I enjoy life when I can document it. Whether it be family scrapbooks, photos on my phone, or blog posts, I can wade through the crazy if I just take a minute to write a few paragraphs and let my brain decompress.
My mom in her wisdom took Dawn aside over the weekend and introduced her to Chris Rice and his music. Each one of my children show their sometimes overwhelmed state differently and thankfully for Dawn, her grandma lives right next door and is the best listener I know. The song "Smell the Color 9" was one my mom thought Dawn could relate to and she was absolutely spot on. I love her!
Dawn told me that she listened with Grandma and loves the words and I think without her saying, she was relieved to find out that someone has felt like she does at times, felt like her enough to even spend time writing a song about it. My songbird is once again singing!
As crazy as things are around here God is doing big things. Every day there is growing. I will save some of the details for the next few days. There are times when I don't feel Him close to me and there are times when He is screaming in everything around me. Lately, there is no doubt that underneath and through it all, He is there. How do I transfer my understanding of a great God to my children? Sometimes I just want them to KNOW! I share my experiences and point them to Him in theirs. Sometimes I send them to Grandma. Of course I pray every day that they will someday just be still and KNOW. In the meantime...smell the color 9!
I would take no for an answer
Just to know I heard You speak
And I'm wonderin' why I've never
Seen the signs they claim they see
Are the special revelations
Meant for everybody but me?
Maybe I don't truly know You
Or maybe I just simply believe
'Cause I can sniff, I can see
And I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me
Any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin'
So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to smell the color 9
Smell the color 9
Now I've never felt the presence
But I know You're always near
And I've never heard the calling
But somehow You've lead me right here
So I'm not looking for burning bushes
Or some divine graffiti to appear
I'm just begging You for Your wisdom
And believe You're putting some here
'Cause I can sniff, I can see
And I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me
Any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin'
So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to smell the color 9
9's not a color
And even if it were you can't smell a color, no
That's my point exactly
